000618 -- The Adventure of the Thorny Sacrifice
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AUTHOR: dsweet
ORIGINAL TITLE: 000611 -- The Adventure of the Thorny Sacrifice
COMPOSED: 6/27/00
UPDATED: 9/26/00
STORY:
  The adventurers jump into a high fantasy Arthurian England.
  During the passing they are met by a frantic Dolares Gifthorse who tells them
    the Rocky Beach Mall HQ is under attack.
  She would like to send in medics to take care of the groups many injuries but
    instead will drop them near a powerful healer's cottage.
  The new world has a good time agent and an evil time agent.
  The evil time agent is called Bolster.
  
  The adventures stumble through the gateway nearly on the doorstep of a cottage.
  The horse tied out front is not friendly.
  
  The old lady that greets the adventurers tells them she is expecting them but
    does not know why.
  She immediately starts mending the many wounds.
  She also tells them a squire to one of Arthur's knights is inside.
  
  Black, the tough, and Neal visit the squire.
  He is injured.
  Apparently his knight which the time travellers believe is the good time agent
    was killed by Bolster.
  Bolster is an amazingly stupid 15 foot giant whose hair has grown to block his
    vision.
  He is so stupid he can not be hurt by anything he can not see and since he can
    not see anyone he is impervious to all attacks.
  
  The good time agent was trying to stop a barbaric tradition in a nearby town
    when he was struck down.
  The tradition requires a maiden to be sacrifice each May day by strapping her to
    a magical thorn covered May Pole.
  The Pole drains the blood of the maiden slowly.
  
  The adventurers walk to this town.
  First they need the right attire and equipment.
  By flashing around quite a bit of 1935 El Honduaguan gold pieces each of the
    active adventurers get appropriate attire and cutlery.
  The tough gets bees and wax.
  Though no one is sure why he has the bees the wax is planned to block the wail
    of the banshee which signals someone's death in these parts.
  
  The adventurers walk to the May Pole.
  In a short time the adventurers discover that blasters are useless against the
    knight which protects the evil tradition and the thorny vines which bind the
    maiden to the pole.
  They also learn that being struck by a sword hurts a lot.
  The adventurers are forced to renounce their non-existant knighthoods.
  
  To limp back to the old women's cottage for healing and insight.
  Both are provided.
  The trio walk down the stairs leading down the old women's well.
  Black and the tough fall, but not to their dooms'.
  Neal gets to the bottom and meets the Spring Queen.
  He tries to woo her with his high school education and fails.
  When he asks for help from his friends which fell earlier they suddenly appear.
  The tough has a good start but fails but Black's bard like skills are
    impressive.
  She lends the trio a giant sword white rose as long as they promise to return
    the white rose and a black rose which had been stolen.
  
  By now the Jay and the Marine are feeling better and are now with the group.
  
  The whole group walk to a vine wall blocking entry to a forest near the Pole.
  They hack in with the rose sword right before the evil knight gets to them.
  Inside they meet a good knight who had lost his love right before the evil
    tradition began.
  The Knight is named Day.
  The adventurers giggle.
  
  The adventurers tell the Knight to buck up repeatedly but is still down in the
    dumps.
  When the Knight is told he can get revenge for the death of his wife by slaying
    the evil Knight he is ready to go.
  Unfortunately four years of eating bugs has tapped his energy reserves.
  Day who looks horrible goes to battle the evil knight.
  Jay tries to help firing a long burst of lead at the approching knight.
  He sucessfully turns the knight's horse to ground chuck.
  While the knight is forced to walk, Neal and the tough run past him into the
    castle.
  There they find shears capable to cutting the giant's hair.
  
  With no little amount of coaxing the knight is ushered back to the old women
    before he is given the opportunity to get beat up by the evil knight.
  Since the knight is horseless and weighed down by his armor the good wanders
    away with the evil knight shaking his fist at them.
  
  Once back at the cottage, they go down the stairs again.
  Neal becomes beholdent to the Spring Queen but her magical berries do the trick.
  Day is feeling like is old self again.
  Jay becomes beholdent also.
  Now cool chicks he likes will like him back.
  
  Back to the pole.
  
  The good knight battles the evil knight.
  Victory for the side of good.
  
  The tough desides he is going to torture the evil knight now that he is dieing.
  With a lot of convincing and a lot of bruising of Neal the torture is avoided.
  Jay and Neal get the dieing knight off the to the women's cottage and with a
    little luck he will be patched up to face appropriate justice.
  
  Now to the Giant's cave.
  The adventurers wait till dark, sneak into the cave and give the Giant a trim.
  While they are trying to tie it down he wakes up.
  A sustained burst from Jay's machine gun and Neal's blaster bring him down.
  
  Dolares appears to gather up the evil time agent giant thingy and to tell the
    band they have a week to rest up.
  She looks to be in bad shape but the attack must be over.
  
  The band uses the week to purchase horses and ride toward Camalot to see the
    silly place.
  Within in sight and sound of the castle a portal opens up.
  Some go through but the rest take eight hours to get a great meal in that
    night's feast.
  Luckily when they return later the portal reopens.
  
  The rest go through into the moving train car.